The Surprising Source of Leadership

This morning I had a call with my dear friend “C.”

We weren’t talking about work or talking about strategy.

We were talking about energy.

I walked her through the Energy Leadership Assessment — the same one I’ve facilitated hundreds of times with executives, teams, and corporations. Every single time I do it, I’m reminded: this is not just a tool. It’s a mirror…and mirrors can be confronting.

When we hung up, she paused and said, “

Wow… I need to sit with this for a while and let it land.”

That’s usually what happens because when you see the lens through which you’re viewing your life, really see it, you can’t unsee it.

Energy Isn’t Woo. It’s Real.

We talk about energy like it’s abstract.

But you feel it.

You feel it when someone walks into a meeting.

You feel it when your spouse walks through the door.

You feel it when a colleague joins a Zoom and hasn’t said a word yet.

Energy is not theoretical. It’s experiential.

We are energetic beings. And the question I always ask is:

Why aren’t we paying more attention to the energy we bring into every room?

The Mirror Moment

As I walked C through her assessment results, I wasn’t judging. I wasn’t fixing. I was simply reflecting.

Here is what the assessment reveals:

• The lens you see the world through

• The filters created by culture, family, and experience

• Where do you feel blocked

• How you lead yourself

• How you inspire (or drain) others

• Your level of engagement in life

• Your level of consciousness

It shows whether you are above the line in ownership, curiosity, and growth.

Or below the line -in blame, fear, guilt, protection.

And here’s what fascinates me: most people don’t realize when they’re below the line.

The language gives it away.

C said things like:

“I should have figured this out by now.” 

“At my age, how do I still not know?”

 "I feel trapped.”

Those words aren’t random. 

They carry energy.

They reveal internal pressure. Self-judgment. Subtle shame.

And when we don’t see it, we live from it.

Complete Oversight of Your Energy

One of the most important principles I shared with her is this:

We must have complete oversight of our energy.

And take 100% responsibility for the energy we receive and transmit.

That’s leadership.

Not positional leadership.

Not title-based leadership.

Self-leadership.

If you are frustrated, defensive, checked out, protective, resentful, that energy is being felt. It impacts your team, your partner, your children, and your clients.

And here’s the empowering part:

When you become aware of it…You can shift it.

Self-awareness is personal power.

Without awareness, there is no choice but with awareness, there is freedom. I am endlessly passionate about this because I have seen it change lives, turning teams from competitive to collaborative, leaders move from fear-based to vision-based, and individuals stop feeling trapped and start taking the reins of their lives.

And it all begins with one simple but radical question:

How am I showing up energetically right now?

Above the line? Or below the line?

Your results in work and life are not random. They are reflections of the energy you consistently bring.

The Invitation

Before your next meeting… pause.

Before walking into your house tonight… pause.

Before responding to that text… pause.

Ask yourself: What energy am I about to transmit?

Whether you realize it or not, you are leading every room you enter.

With heart,