Be With

"Sometimes what we're searching for isn't outside of us. It's quietly waiting for us in the stillness."

I've been noticing something lately. Many people have a difficult time simply being with themselves.

No distractions we typically turn to, like our phones (big one!), television, social media, podcasts (YouTube is my go-to, I have to admit), music, or the endless list of things to do.

Just themselves. For many, being with themselves feels surprisingly uncomfortable, and I understand because I used to be that way too. If there was a space in my day, I filled it. I would call a friend, start another load of laundry, go for a run, answer emails, clean the house, write something, or find another project. Staying busy felt productive. Sitting quietly with myself felt unfamiliar and awkward. Looking back, I don't think I was intentionally avoiding myself. I simply didn't know there was another way to live my life, but over the years, something shifted. Now, some of my favorite moments are the quiet ones.

On warm summer evenings, I'll go outside and lie down in the soft grass or stretch out on the trampoline in our backyard. I'll watch the sun slowly disappear behind the mountains as the sky changes from blue to shades of pink, orange, and deep purple. The first stars begin to appear, the moon quietly takes her place in the sky, and the bats come alive, darting effortlessly back and forth as they search for their evening meal.

I simply notice and do nothing. 

When I do, I start to see the beauty around, and it is amazing what begins to surface when there is nothing left to distract us. This is when we truly get to know ourselves, and if you really slow down and think about it, what else is there? We are with ourselves 24/7, 365 days a year, every year, so don't we want to know ourselves? Asking the bigger questions: 

How am I really feeling?

What has been weighing on me?

What am I avoiding?

What is bringing me joy?

What do I truly love, and am I spending time doing that or with that person?

Sometimes when I slow down to just BE, I realize I've been carrying stress I hadn't acknowledged. Sometimes I notice I'm disappointed in myself because I didn't follow through on something I said I would do. Other times, I discover a deep sense of peace that had been there all along, patiently waiting for me to slow down long enough to notice it, a calm inside the stillness. It's all good. 

Those moments of honesty are gifts; they remind me that the relationship I have with myself influences every relationship I have with others.

It's one of the reasons I loved hiking the Colorado Trail by myself, and honestly, why I'm beginning to crave it again, because life became wonderfully simple.

I wonder if one of the greatest life lessons is learning to enjoy our own company. To become curious about the person we've spent our entire lives with.To discover that we don't always need another distraction, another conversation, or another accomplishment to feel whole. Sometimes what we're searching for isn't outside of us; it's quietly waiting for us in the stillness.

This week, I invite you to carve out just a few minutes for yourself. Sit in the grass. Watch the sunset. Listen to the birds. Feel the breeze against your skin and for once, don't do…

Just be.

You may discover that the person you've been rushing past all these years is someone worth getting to know.

With heart,